Wednesday, March 7, 2012


A World with Nothing to Give

I don’t want to live in a world destined to get worse, and I am afraid that that is exactly the kind of world we are heading towards. I base this assumption on my own personal observations. Every day I see the people around me purposely turning a blind eye to reality in return for burden-free ignorance. The ironic part is that the same means that provide us with those trivialities are also being used to expunge us of our ignorance and make us keenly aware of the world we’re creating.  Social media is both vice and virtue, providing us with 24/7 mind numbing frivolities as well as gateways to mind opening revelations. But it is my observation that too few care about the later, disregarding it altogether. My parents for example have no problem dedicating their free hours to the big man on TV telling them what is important, funny, and tragic. But ask them to take 30-minutes to learn about a notorious African killer, rapist, kidnapper, and megalomaniac and they can’t seem to find any of that spare time to spare. Instead they roll it of their consciences with the belief that there is nothing they can do, so why penetrate their happy bubbles with unhappy truths. The reality though, is that there are many things that they could do because advocates like those at Invisible Children Inc. have made it possible for them to make a difference in a meaningful way. All that’s required of them is to take the time to understand what’s going, and then answer the question about what they can do to stop it. But that simple desire to educate one’s self is nonexistent, a moot point; there are more pressing issues at hand such as watching the rerun of Two and a half Men.



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Tuesday, February 28, 2012

"Wasting time with you in mind" -

What is today but another day to waste away?

What is time wasted to a person whose days have come to an end?

 These questions aren't rhetorical.

I'm not so sure where I am going with this blog, or if anyone will ever read it. But that's ok, because all I am really looking for is a medium in which I can express my rambling thoughts. Below is a piece I wrote a few years ago after a long night run near Ala Moana beach.


Death of a cockroach

Its been dark for a good three hours now and here I am lying down on the side walk at ala moana beach park. The oceans waves are crashing just loud enough for me to sense them over the melodious music cascading into my ears from my tarnished ipod. I stand to my feet as if somehow it will make me feel closer to the stars shining above. Moving with the rhythms in my head, I cast my glaze up, around, and down to the ground. With a spontaneous flick, I quickly, as if habitually my nature, react to the sight of a huge ugly brown cockroach by crushing him with my heel.
 
Why?
As I sat there staring at the dead roach I couldn’t help but to ask myself why I had found it necessary and almost natural to kill a creature that posed absolutely no threat and caused no harm to me by being alive. You may think that I am a weird, vegan, greenpeace, emotional, hippie girl, and the truth is I am all those things, but I hope that you can try to relate to me on this.
So I killed this innocent roach that was minding its own business, outside in its own habitat. I can’t tell you why I felt like I had the right to take his life. Is it because I had more power than him? Is it because I didn’t want to share the sidewalk with him, even though there was plenty enough room for the both of us? Is it because I was better than the roach and I have more of a right to life? Was it because he was different from me and I was afraid of that? Did my fear lead me to be insecure and ultimately elicit hostilities towards the roach to boost my own self-purpose? 
            With all these questions clouding my mind I began to see a simulation between our story and the societal history of our world. I realized that these very questions are the same ones I would pose towards Hitler of Germany, Slobo of Serbia, Pharaoh of Egypt, Hutu's of Rwanda and Burundi, colonizers of the world, slave owners in America, racist of the past and present, Andrew Jackson and the Indians, Australians and the Aborigines, Sudanese government and it's southern peoples, and so on and so forth.

And so I cried. I cried because I killed the roach for no better reason than the questions listed above…. and it disgust me to know that.  So yes, I think we should have  an appreciation for every living thing from people to plants to ants to elephants. I don’t have the right to take anythings life just because I can or because I am afraid and you don’t either, not as an individual or a group…….. I donno how to make this world less shittier than it is, but hopefully this translates into someones life in a positive way….. and maybe we will begin to start appreciating life more and destruction less.

R.I.P.

Mr. Roach~ I'm really sorry.
Song of the Day: Somebody that I use to know by Gotye Ft. Kimbra

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UVNT4wvIGY

What do you think?

Thursday, February 23, 2012


Welcome! This blog is about my journey into the so called "real world". It's about trying to find a balance between doing what I love and doing what I need to do to survive. This is just the beginning and I'm starting at the bottom. A little background... I graduated with a degree in International Relations with a minor in Spanish. I graduated with 3.84 GPA and I've traveled all over the world. I thought getting a job would be easy, but the truth is I can't even get an interview with to be an administrative assistant. Fuck me. So I started this blog as a means to vent, and also with the hope of finding others that are going through the same thing, or have been there done that. Don't worry this blog won't be a complete downer. I plan on expressing everything on these blank Internet pages. My interests are eclectic so it should never be a boring read. I love music and I'm a total logophile. Welcome to my mind, navigating it will take some time.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/logophile